What is your major malfunction?
Just when you think you're riding a high...life comes at you both barrels blazing. I'm still ril ril excited about the new technology parts, don't get me wrong. The iPhone is, how shall I put this?, fucking awesome. I haven't gotten my first bill yet. so there's still ample opportunity for AT&Torture to screw it up royally, but for real? There's just nothing like it out there. That I've seen. Shut up haters.
And the Macbook, god love her. She's so pretty and clean. And boots up before you can say "Windows can suck it". And is just very un-Windowslike all around. So yeah, these technology parts are good for once. I'm not taking that for granted.
But then I had to go and get some kind of sinus-y, stuffy, cold-y, move-to-my-lungs thingy on Saturday, only the nicest day of the year. And then Sunday, I got to remember what it's like to have hives in case I'd forgotten in the last blissfull month and a half without them.
And then Monday? Life thought I needed a reality check. It's the only reason I can guess for why Surfer Boy's wallet got stolen out of the van in Bumfuck, MO. Many unauthorized trips to Wally World later, and we've got ourselves some proper thieves. We caught it pretty early on, which means they only had 24 hours to visit every Wal-Mart in a 20-mile radius with both debit cards and a credit card. Good times!
They charged a lot of money, but the good news I have from just a few hours ago is that they've caught them! Surveillance tapes show them using our cards and the bastards were apprehended with - can you fucking believe it - our cards still on them!
Oh! And I forgot the part where I found out on Friday that my passport, the one I need to go on a work trip in t-minus four weeks and counting, is not where I intended to send it (a passport agency that handles adding pages within a week) but in the bowels of the guv'mint's passport agency, slated for ROUTINE processing and the only way I can get it before the 10-12 week (NOT FREAKING KIDDING) normal turnaround, is by calling within two weeks of my travel date, so THEN they can expedite the processing. I'm so screwed. Dude, why weren't you in Barcelona for the conference? Oh, because I couldn't get pages added to my passport in time. YEAH. Fired.
And the Macbook, god love her. She's so pretty and clean. And boots up before you can say "Windows can suck it". And is just very un-Windowslike all around. So yeah, these technology parts are good for once. I'm not taking that for granted.
But then I had to go and get some kind of sinus-y, stuffy, cold-y, move-to-my-lungs thingy on Saturday, only the nicest day of the year. And then Sunday, I got to remember what it's like to have hives in case I'd forgotten in the last blissfull month and a half without them.
And then Monday? Life thought I needed a reality check. It's the only reason I can guess for why Surfer Boy's wallet got stolen out of the van in Bumfuck, MO. Many unauthorized trips to Wally World later, and we've got ourselves some proper thieves. We caught it pretty early on, which means they only had 24 hours to visit every Wal-Mart in a 20-mile radius with both debit cards and a credit card. Good times!
They charged a lot of money, but the good news I have from just a few hours ago is that they've caught them! Surveillance tapes show them using our cards and the bastards were apprehended with - can you fucking believe it - our cards still on them!
Oh! And I forgot the part where I found out on Friday that my passport, the one I need to go on a work trip in t-minus four weeks and counting, is not where I intended to send it (a passport agency that handles adding pages within a week) but in the bowels of the guv'mint's passport agency, slated for ROUTINE processing and the only way I can get it before the 10-12 week (NOT FREAKING KIDDING) normal turnaround, is by calling within two weeks of my travel date, so THEN they can expedite the processing. I'm so screwed. Dude, why weren't you in Barcelona for the conference? Oh, because I couldn't get pages added to my passport in time. YEAH. Fired.
Comments
Re-reading that it sounds so sappy and dumb. I wanted to balance it out with a nice derogatory name for you, but nothing is coming to mind. Damn! How about I just tell you to suck it with your new technology.
1) that they charged enough, or just the crime itself is considered a felony
2) you get to see them, and you get to point and laugh because they are going to the county lockup, where they have probably been before
3) you get all your money back because lord knows that there are some new Apple gadgets coming out in the future that you are going to need
rah rah sis boom bah
(can't they just issue you a new passport or is that not how it works?)
K - No, he wasn't around the lodge, it was closer to the city. And no, you can't just get a new one when you've already got a passport and it's stuck in Charleston, SC in ROUTINE fucking processing. Whoever decided the rule that they will only expedite a passport in processing until two weeks before your travel date is one sadistic MF.