What is your major malfunction?

Just when you think you're riding a high...life comes at you both barrels blazing. I'm still ril ril excited about the new technology parts, don't get me wrong. The iPhone is, how shall I put this?, fucking awesome. I haven't gotten my first bill yet. so there's still ample opportunity for AT&Torture to screw it up royally, but for real? There's just nothing like it out there. That I've seen. Shut up haters.

And the Macbook, god love her. She's so pretty and clean. And boots up before you can say "Windows can suck it". And is just very un-Windowslike all around. So yeah, these technology parts are good for once. I'm not taking that for granted.

But then I had to go and get some kind of sinus-y, stuffy, cold-y, move-to-my-lungs thingy on Saturday, only the nicest day of the year. And then Sunday, I got to remember what it's like to have hives in case I'd forgotten in the last blissfull month and a half without them.

And then Monday? Life thought I needed a reality check. It's the only reason I can guess for why Surfer Boy's wallet got stolen out of the van in Bumfuck, MO. Many unauthorized trips to Wally World later, and we've got ourselves some proper thieves. We caught it pretty early on, which means they only had 24 hours to visit every Wal-Mart in a 20-mile radius with both debit cards and a credit card. Good times!

They charged a lot of money, but the good news I have from just a few hours ago is that they've caught them! Surveillance tapes show them using our cards and the bastards were apprehended with - can you fucking believe it - our cards still on them!

Oh! And I forgot the part where I found out on Friday that my passport, the one I need to go on a work trip in t-minus four weeks and counting, is not where I intended to send it (a passport agency that handles adding pages within a week) but in the bowels of the guv'mint's passport agency, slated for ROUTINE processing and the only way I can get it before the 10-12 week (NOT FREAKING KIDDING) normal turnaround, is by calling within two weeks of my travel date, so THEN they can expedite the processing. I'm so screwed. Dude, why weren't you in Barcelona for the conference? Oh, because I couldn't get pages added to my passport in time. YEAH. Fired.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Oh Sis, you can't see me but I'm giving you a big hug....and a beer. Life is crap, I agree, just when things are looking up, some jackass steels your wallet and goes on the spending spree you've always wanted (except not at Wal-mart). I know there's not much we can do to help, but you know we're here and we love you!!
Re-reading that it sounds so sappy and dumb. I wanted to balance it out with a nice derogatory name for you, but nothing is coming to mind. Damn! How about I just tell you to suck it with your new technology.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
C-C-C-Corn Dog said…
J - thanks for the hug. It was a scary few hours when we first found out, but hopefully, we're on the upward trend again.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
JDW said…
I hope:

1) that they charged enough, or just the crime itself is considered a felony

2) you get to see them, and you get to point and laugh because they are going to the county lockup, where they have probably been before

3) you get all your money back because lord knows that there are some new Apple gadgets coming out in the future that you are going to need


rah rah sis boom bah
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Life said…
daaaamn that sucks. i hope you got or will get all of your money back. isn't there fraud protection on debit/credit cards? were you at the lodge (or in the area) when it got stolen? sorry you aren't feeling good. you'll have to come over next time.
(can't they just issue you a new passport or is that not how it works?)
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
C-C-C-Corn Dog said…
J - Thanks to a certain sheriff, who cracked the case and kept us in the loop the whole time, we'll hopefully get all of our money back and they will get convicted of a felony since the amount was over $900. So far, the bank has credited two of the three $500+ WM sprees and none of the random Taco Bell, Fast Lane, bull shit purchases.

K - No, he wasn't around the lodge, it was closer to the city. And no, you can't just get a new one when you've already got a passport and it's stuck in Charleston, SC in ROUTINE fucking processing. Whoever decided the rule that they will only expedite a passport in processing until two weeks before your travel date is one sadistic MF.
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Hey look! Are those cookies over there?

Will that post title work to distract you from the long slog between posts that seems to have become the norm? If yes, awesome, you're my kind of distracted. If not, toughen up, there's an arduous journey ahead of you and you should really save your strength for something more important to worry about...like toe hair and nose grease. And since that last might have sounded like some kind of advice, please heed my warning to never ever EVER, under penalty of looking stupid, take my advice on anything. "What do I know" is a common disclaimer I add to the ends of sentences in real life. If you want to get into the semantics of it, what do any of us really know ? Nothing is a foregone conclusion - I mean, just ask Pluto. You go for years being considered an equal and then some squinty-eyed scientists decide to strip you of your very lifeblood - who will ever learn to care about a non-planet? I guess lately I have been fooled into complacency, thinking I know somethin...
Read more

Stupid Saturn Rising

My horoscope today said that "my insecurity has taken on a life of its own". That's comforting. Now I remember why I quit reading horoscopes. Although, I thought I was just making the title up with this reference to Saturn rising, but as it turns out, my astrological chart really does say that Saturn is my ascendant planet right now. I'm super fucking in tune with my planets, so just keep that in mind. It's my secret weapon. In other news, have you ever had that problem where you have absolutely so much going on and so much to do, that you find yourself unable to start and complete one simple task? Take for instance, a blog post. I must have started writing on four separate posts in the last week, yet you can easily see nothing new posted in that time frame. I'm guilting on the fact that I haven't posted in so long. Generally, I wouldn't care so much - at least not enough to feel guilty about it - but the wicked knowledge that there are a few hardy sou...
Read more

Travel Dogs

Image
bahamas05 030 Originally uploaded by Corn Dog . We're back from the Bahamas and now have moved seamlessly into the roles of guest entertainers. Dirty Gravy's Mom & Step Joe are in town for a week - they arrived the day after we got back into town, so it's been a bit hectic. Still have all of our gift shopping to finish and of course, I've managed to come down with a rockin' head cold. I'm not complaining though, I really hate chest colds and so far, this one's stayed in the sinus region. I'll be back early next week to relate the tale of the Sex Hex of the Bahamas and profess my love of Zicam.
Read more